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Here are some of the Headlines The Sage is working on.


Oregon & Colorado Pass Bigfoot Laws

(SNN) - Oregon declares Bigfoot an endangered species and will fine anyone who kills one $100 K. On the other hand, Colorado issues special $20 hunting license and rakes in millions from tourists, who want to be the first to kill one.


Real Reason the Maker Stopped Making Lethal-Injection Drug Discovered

(SNN) - Tens of thousands of anti-death penalty advocates bought the company, an SNN reporter discovered. “And since we own the patent, we’ll sue anyone who tries to make it,” a representative of the stockholders said.


Dennis Rodman Hounded by Hordes of Book Ghostwriters and Comedy Screenwriters.

(SNN) - They all want to write the hottest story of the last 50 years, the story of him and his best bud, Kim Jong Un “I thought paparazzi were bad,” Dennis said in a phone interview with SNN on his cellphone, as he tried to make another run for it..


Justin Bieber Sentenced

(SNN) - The judge took him over his knee and gave him a good spanking.


Ed Toolis’ website – http://skirmishes.us

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
 
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