news director

Please Support our Sponsors

Expert Says Future is Late

(SNN) - Yogi Berra once said “It’s tough to make predictions, especially about the future” and no one agrees more than Professor Hans Strum, noted futurist at the University of Saskatchewan, Saskatoon.

The tenured professor claims the future is more than flying cars, cures for wheat germ, and colonizing distant galaxies. “These are not hard problems to solve, though I wouldn’t want to be a pedestrian in Manhattan during flying car rush hour.”

The author of “Dude, Where’s my Jetpack?” and “2008 Never Happened,” uses a sophisticated computer model to map trends and make predictions. While the model isn’t perfect, he does claim to have predicted the first iPhone well before Apple announced it in 2007.  “I sent an email to Steve Jobs. Three weeks later, he announced the product!”

But predicting the future is not without risk. Strum acknowledges that bankers who followed his famous “In the future we’ll all live in a ranch-style tract home” prediction in 2008 accidentally triggered a worldwide real estate collapse. “On the brighter side, I accurately predicted the 16GB version of iPhone in 2008. Unfortunately it wasn’t enough to prevent the world from economic collapse.”

When looking for inspiration, Strum asserts that science fiction is a great predictor of future fact. “With the exception of ray-guns and blue-skinned space babes, most of Star Trek has now come true.”

Futurism is a profession for optimists, but Strum admits to occasional bouts of devastating nostalgia.  He also expresses deep frustration with the slow pace of government. “Until legislatures eliminate unnecessary regulation, the future will be slow to arrive,” he asserts. “First step: Ottawa must repeal the job-killing Law of Gravity.”

In spite of the difficulty, Strum plows forward with his visionary work, confident that when the future finally arrives, it will have been worth waiting for.

Photo by: Alden Jewell flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
More from R.S. Gompertz



Most Viewed

Promote Your Business

Social Activity

Top ^