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Young Girl Injured By Gift Christmas Hippo

Photo: What's not to love?

(SNN) Little Gaila Peavey of Festus, Missouri, was thrilled to receive the only gift she wanted for Christmas; a real, live hippopotamus. Her father had scraped together just enough to buy it from Amazon for the wee tyke.

"Thank heavens it came with free shipping!" he had said when the gigantic river mammal was delivered.

Unfortunately, after a couple days in a box under the tree with just a few air holes and some hippo kibble for food, the hippopotamus became enraged. When the little girl opened her festively-wrapped package, the hippo burst out and gave the tot unspecified injuries in a violent encounter which destroyed the family trailer and all of their belongings.

Damage has been estimated at $5,670.

ASPCA special forces have been tracking the animal since its escape, as it went on a violent rampage, leaving destruction and carnage in its wake. Included in the damage was a PT Cruiser which the owner said she had to flee when it became apparent the hippo had amorous intentions toward the vehicle.

"It was awful," said Areola Jacobs. "The enormous critter was bellowing and throwing himself on my poor car. Does car insurance even cover this sort of thing? It looks like it's been through the compactor at the junk yard."

The hippo is also reportedly responsible for allegedly, severely injuring a group of PETA activists who had gathered around the beast yelling "Run free, majestic creature, run free!"

If you see the animal, do not approach it. Call 911 and seek shelter. Oh, and Merry Christmas.

Photo: Some Rights Reserved by Gustavo Jeronimo Flickr photostream, The Sage nor this article endorsed. The original image can also be found here.


DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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