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Harper Haters' Guide to Nasty Nicknames

Photo: He likes 'em this big


(SNN) Whether you hate him or tolerate him, there is no middle ground on the current Prime Ministerial Popularity Meter. For those with Harper Derangement Syndrome (HDS), however, they have taken creative cruelty to heights not seen since the last Prime Minister and the one before him.

Whoever is at the helm of the ship of state, tends to gather barnacles along the way that are difficult to shed, the longer they are guiding the ship. Detractors often manage to produce some interesting nicknames for their leaders to help we unwashed masses vent our spleens at our situations obviously brought about by poor governance, such as an ailing economy, low oil prices and erectile dysfunction..

That's why, on the comment boards on news sites, from sea to sea to cyberspace, (and in some commenters' cases, it seems, from outer space), those with HDS have been using some wicked word-play to make fun of our unhuggable, unlovable leader.

Here then are some of the mean-sprinted monikers HDS ravaged brains have spawned to describe PMSH* (besides as a POS**):

The Kloset Kommander (Referencing his hiding place during the Parliament Hill shooter incident, resulting in many "coming out of the closet" jokes.)

Thievin' Steven (Conjures the image of a politician being the answer to the question, "What's in YOUR wallet?" Rhymes nicely, too. Great job.)

Steve-O (As in "Let's give Steve-O the heave-ho!". Very clever. Our judge gives this one three thumbs up.)

Porky (He has gained a bit of weight. Not Duffy-esque weight, but a bit.)

Harpo (We don't get that one, either.)

Stevie (An apparent attempt to feminize him, much like rabid CPC supporters calling Mr. Trudeau, "Justina". There is no equivalent for Mr. Mulcair or Ms. May.)

Prime Minister Nixon (Ouch!)

Helmet Hair (See photo above; perhaps a reaction to the fuss over Mr. Trudeau's hair. Nobody mentions Gilles Duceppe's hair much. Or his platform. Or his party.)

The Head Conbot (Apparently, all CPCers are heartless, soulless, automatons who only care about their money, unlike tree-hugging, pipeline hating, carbon tax supporting  'progressives' who also care about the CPCers money.)

It might be engaging for all of us to consider what personal trait, foible, or aspect we each have that would be attacked should we accidentally become Prime Minister. We shudder to think. In our case, perhaps, "Porky".

* Prime Minister Stephen Harper
** Piece of poop

Unaltered Photo: Some Rights Reserved by primeministergr Flickr photostream, The Sage nor this article endorsed. The original image can also be found here.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
 
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