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Giant Creature Escapes From Cloning Lab

Photo: Picture snapped on iPhone before owner was eaten

(SNN) - A secret laboratory beneath the Royal Tyrrell Museum in Drumheller, Canada was suddenly exposed to public view when a thirty metre (three deca-metre) lizard-like creature broke through a wall and lumbered toward the desert. Museum officials claim no knowledge of the advanced cloning facility that was revealed beneath the dinosaur museum.

“Of course we would never break any laws against cloning,” chuckled Professor Tyrone Esoress-Rex, communications manager for the facility. “Are there any laws against cloning? Seems rather pointless when nobody is cloning anything at all hardly, anymore. Whatever happened to Dolly the cloned sheep, eh? Cloning is so last century.”

Royal Canadian Mounted Police were dispatched to the scene of the event and immediately confiscated all electronic devices with picture-taking ability in order to control the situation. Busses came to collect witnesses who came forward although rumour has it none have ever been heard from again.

A team of black-suited government representatives from an unspecified ministry advised the press that the situation was a case of mass-hysteria and the giant creature people claimed to have seen was actually swamp gas. Members of the media were then advised that if they wanted to pursue the story, the government men would arrange transportation to join the busloads of witnesses they had rounded up. None accepted the offer.

Unaltered Photo: Some Right Reserved by flickr photostream, The Sage nor this article endorsed. The original image can be found here.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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