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Ford Offers Toronto Mayor $1M to Change Surname to Chev

Photo: Rob Ford Reacts to Ford's Offer

(SNN) - The Ford Motor Company has confirmed it has approached the beleaguered Toronto Mayor, Rob Ford, about changing his name. The company would prefer he switch to a surname like Chevrolet, Pontiac or Chrysler but is willing to accept anything other than Ford.

"He is killing our brand," said celebrity spokesman, Harrison Ford. "Can you imagine the mental associations people now make with the Ford name? He has done more damage to our reputation than the Ford Fiesta."

Co-VP's of marketing for the auto manufacturer, England Dan and John Ford Coley, echoed the actor's sentiments regarding the danger to the Ford Brand that Rob represents.

"The only Crack Masters we want associated with our products are for windshield repair," claimed Dan and Coley in perfect harmony. "We are therefore rejecting his offer of Rob Focus."

Photo: Some rights reserved by HiMY SYeD  flickr photostream, The Sage nor this article endored. Original image can be found here.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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