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Worst Shows of the New TV Season

(SNN) - Another TV season is upon us and programmers have dug deep to recycle, reuse, and reduce our entertainment options to a brain-numbing minimum. Here are the Top 10 best new viewing opportunities for self-hating viewers with absolutely nothing better to do:

Downton Sherlock: The BBC hires an edgy detective to find evidence of plot and compelling characters in a house full of aristocratic morons and their scheming servants.

Crack is the new Black: Albuquerque, NM struggles with withdrawal in the aftermath of "Breaking Bad."

America’s Got Bullets: The sequel to “Guess Who’s Carrying a Concealed Weapon” in which liberal Democrats invoke “stand your ground” laws to avoid conviction after murdering old ladies they find annoying.

Bread Rising:  Vegan zombies terrorize San Francisco in search of ancient sourdough yeast.

Booger Town: Sexy old ladies seduce and cure liberal Democrats with runny noses.

Mortlandia: Sketch comedy about hipster vampires who run a deadly B&B in Portland, Oregon.

Loud Mary: Garage bands compete for top billing on the Myspace home page.

Cluster Duck Dynasty: Howard, Donald, and Darkwing Duck join forces to find camouflaged hunters and shoot them. 

Fad Men: Well-dressed men with no redeeming qualities behave badly and learn nothing.

Lost Girls: Lena Dunham and her girlfriends get stranded on a mysterious island and still can’t find a story.

Photo: "RCA black/white Indian Head test card, motif of the 2F21 monoscope tube, used from 1940 until the advent of color television." PD-US-NO NOTICE.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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