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A Quiet Christmas -a Loud 2013 - Dec 28, 2013


(SNN) - Why do all of the house fires happen at Christmas? In a slow news cycle, this is the kind of daily human tragedy that is suddenly promoted to major headline. Otherwise, this year’s Festive news cycle was headed by Heads of Governments going on vacation, a non-Bieber-act-of-vadalism-moment, and the Wrath of God being aimed at Toronto. I did get excited momentarily when Rob Ford was asked about the Ice Storm. Surely he couldn’t take another everyday situation and, while trying to answer it, carefully put his foot in his mouth again, could he? No – He concentrated hard, and said something…every day. You could hear Doug’s sigh of relief from out here on the West Coast.

In fact, just like other journalists, I was finally forced to trawl through my printed work this year, and come up with ‘some things that I learned this year’, so that I could get to Christmas as fast as possible. As you can see from the above picture…it was a tough Christmas Morning, so forgive me:

Justin Bieber has, possibly, the worst PR person in the History of PR persons.

Rob Ford needs someone in PR, or perhaps Psychiatry. Anyone who is an elected official, addicted to alcohol, has a history of illegal narcotic use, and is misogynistic, with no mental-to-mouth filter, is NOT ‘just a regular guy’. He’s about as ‘regular’ as a Duck Dynasty cast member.

Beyoncé is just as attractive whether she’s lip-synching or singing live.

Popes can resign, Canadian Senators can be fired. Both have gone from lives of doing nothing much with a ton of free travel, to a life of leisure.

No matter how badly the ruling BC political party have treated voters over the previous four years, they will return to power if the favoured party is headed by Adrian Dix.

The experts in the field are split between if Facebook is dead, or merely dying. The non-experts like you and me are thinking: “So what?”

No matter what a federal politician says when they are first elected, they are as fluid in their beliefs as a new $20 bill after an hour in direct sunlight: All of them…with no exceptions. I’m tired of being naively supportive of any of them.

Sun News TV is just as bad an idea as expecting Senator Mike Duffy to delete e-mails.

The Obamacare website was designed by Canadians, as were the non-functioning exterior cameras on the International Space Station, and Blackberry. Are you sensing a pattern, here?

Even the NBA’s Number One pick is playing up to his skill level at about the same level as the Hamilton Tiger-Cats did.

‘Selfie’ won the ‘word of the year’ competition, but should never be attempted just because you are in a bathroom and you see a phone near you. See the picture above for a reason why.

Resolutions for the New Year: No more Selfie’s, no more Politics as usual, no more Justin Bieber.

I don’t think there’s much hope, do you?


Steve James is an Actor, Stand up, and Comedy writer in Vancouver BC. He’s glad that you can’t see his Christmas Jammies and woolly socks.

 

DISCLAIMER: The above article is OPINION.The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Opinion and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
 
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