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Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Appointed Seat in the Canadian Senate.

(SNN) - The beleaguered Mayor of Toronto, Rob Ford, was offered a rest from conflict today when word came down from Ottawa that he had been given a cushy appointment. “It's about time they recognized my true talents,” came the remark from Toronto Mayor Rob Ford.

During an economic luncheon located at Toronto's “The Black Hoof”, Prime Minister Harper announced to a packed room that he has just appointed Rob Ford to the Canadian Senate. “After a great deal of thought, I have decided that Toronto's Mayor, Rob Ford, is well suited to serve in the Canadian Senate,” was the word from the Prime Minister.

The olive branch came as a result of Toronto Councillor Jaye Robinson asking Ford to step aside and take a leave of absence as a result of news that the Mayor had been chumming with 'gangstas' and partaking in crack cocaine.

Government spokesperson Petoria Weller advised The Sage that Ford will bring some integrity to the Senate in the wake of the recent expense account scandal surrounding Senators Mike Duffy, Mac Harb, Pamela Wallin, and Patrick Brazeau. “We needed an enforcer in the Senate,” advised Weller, “Rob Ford has the chops to keep everyone in line.”

When asked how he saw his fellow Senator's, Ford advised, “I wish I was as straight as everybody in the Senate.” When pushed to clarify his statement Ford added, “There might be a coat hanger left in my closet - I don’t know what’s left. Don’t come across like you’re holier than thou, because you aren’t!”

It was apparent that Ford may not have been prepared for The Sage's interview.

Photo: Some rights reserved by West Annex News flickr photosteam, The Sage nor this article endorsed.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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