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Bill and Hillary Clinton Divorced

Democratic Party A Hive Of Speculation


(SNN) - Democratic Party spokesman Leonard “Lefty” Furdwobble has issued a statement claiming Hillary Clinton and her husband, Bill, are “divorced from reality” if they believe they could win with a wife/husband ticket in the 2016 presidential election. Although Bill is not eligible to be president, there are no procedural impediments to him being vice-president. For some Democrats, a Hillary/Bill duo would be just the ticket to keep the White House blue. Or, as seasoned political pundit, Omar Gerde, wrote in his blog, ‘the pairing would be the blue states’ wet dream’. However, according to Furdwobble’s statement, the Clintons may not enjoy the blessing of the party machinery which is currently in an uproar over the matter.

“As rosy as a Clinton – Clinton ticket might sound to the average registered Democrat, can you imagine the impact on the undecided?” Furdwobble wrote. “The Republicans would kill us! Bill’s got a reputation for immorality that would rival Ron Jeremy’s. Not that I ever heard of Ron Jeremy.”

It wasn’t just Bill’s political liabilities that Furdwobble has concerns about. Although he mentions it was a politically astute maneuver to stay away from the spotlight during Obama’s last term; giving up her cushy Secretary of State job in order to let Kerry take the heat while she stays clear of any controversy, she still has electability issues; not the least of which will be Hillary’s age.

“By the time 2016 rolls around, Mrs. Clinton will be 69,” Furdwobble pointed out. “Sure that may be Bill’s favorite number, but it makes Hillary seem kind of long-of-tooth. Her only hope would be if McCain won the nomination again for the GOP and we know that will never happen.”

Neither Clinton would comment on the statement as they are keeping Hillary incommunicado in the basement of their house until the Democratic primaries, while Bill is taking advantage of Hillary’s self-imposed house arrest.


Photo by: Marc Nozell  flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed

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