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Snap,Crackle Outraged as Pop Goes Off On His Own

Solo Career Threatens Famous Trio

(SNN) - Popular cereal pitchmen, Snap, Crackle and Pop are breaking up. The red-headed mop-top, Pop, who’s real name is Norbert Feldman, has been working with Snap and Crackle, played by Humphrey Borgnine and Sydney Greenroad respectively, since the 1930’s.

“It was time to strike out on my own,” claimed the still youthful-looking Pop. “I’ve already managed to get a couple of solo gigs. I did some stuff for Corn Pops and my agent is working a deal with Pop-Tarts. I turned down a gig with the Mini-Pops, however. A guy has to have some principles. Sure, I will miss the other guys but 80 years doing the exact same gig day in and day out is soul crushing. I know how Wayne Newton must have felt.”

Snap and Crackle have not taken Pop’s departure from the group well. Both, however, admitted they had seen it coming when Pop signed with a different manager/agent than the other two.

“I think it kind of started when Snap started dating this weird oriental woman,” confided Crackle. “Pop and Snap have always had a bit of a rocky relationship and that woman just pushed Pop over the edge.”

Snap and Crackle have already signed with a production company to produce a reality show called “The Next Rice Crispie” to replace their former colleague. Contestant will be placed in a bowl and have milk poured on them to see what sounds they make.

“We’re looking for a ‘Bang’ or a ‘Pow’, although a ‘Biff’ might do. It worked for Batman,” stated Crackle. “We had considered Captain Crunch but we were a bit leery. He hadn’t been promoted after all these years for some mysterious reason that only the navy knows, so we felt he might pose a risk.”

Photo by: Penny  flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed

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