news director

Please Support our Sponsors

Pope Francis says he didn't want to be pope.


(SNN) – In response to a question asked by a student Friday, Pope Francis said he did not want to become the pontiff. “Anyone who wants to be pope doesn't care about themselves,” stated Pope Francis. “I mean, I didn't want the job, I really didn't. To be frank, I didn't want to move into the palace. The place is so big a person could lose their marbles.”

The Sage has learned that Pope Francis had actually applied for a lower palace position, but was passed over three times. “I don't understand what the Holy Father's concerns are,” said Giovanni Sanatori, a garbage collector living in Rome. “How can he not care about himself? He should come down here and pick up after these people in this city. I mean really, it's unbelievable what these people throw away! There are days I feel like I am losing my mind.”

Vatican officials have been concerned that Pope Francis could be losing his sanity over the concern of human waste worldwide. “Yes, the Holy Father is very much concerned over the waste people leave behind,” said an unnamed official.

“You tell the Holy Father not be concerned,” said Sanatori, “One day, I will most likely find his marbles; I have been finding the marbles of Romans for years.”

In the mean time Pope Francis has moved into a simple hotel-like Vatican residence.


Photo by: Edgar Jiménez flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor his article endorsed.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
 
More from Brian K. Hahn

 

Recent

Most Viewed

Promote Your Business


Social Activity



Top ^