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Apple Buys Samsung

'If You Can't Beat 'Em, Buy 'Em Out'


(SNN) - Apple executives are gloating that they have finally beaten Samsung once and for all. After a series of lawsuits and counter-suits between the two companies over copyright infringement, Apple decided to dig around in the boardroom chairs to come up with the money to take over the rival company.

One of the reasons Apple had decided to absorb the upstart competitor was to save themselves from the mounting legal costs that both companies were facing as a result of their shared enthusiasm for litigation.  Company accountants had even factored in the savings in lawyers’ fees when calculating their cost/benefit analyses of the takeover. It was a shock to Apple officials, however, when their legal department advised them that due to ironclad contracts with Samsung’s former legal firm, Bob’s Lawyering and Grill, the Samsung portion of the parent company is still obligated to pursue Apple patent infringement issues. Until the current legal wrangling has come to some kind of conclusion, Apple is, in effect suing itself.

“It is a ridiculous situation to be in,” confessed an Apple insider who only identified himself as Cor. “Our entire legal team is twisting itself into knots trying to figure out a way to break the contract. They have come to the conclusion it is almost as ironclad as the average cellular contract in Canada.”

Photo by: Ricky Romero flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed

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