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Quebec Passes Law Requiring Dogs to be Bilingual

(SNN) – The National Assembly of Quebec has passed a law that requires dogs in that province to understand all commands in both English and French. “We (Quebecers) are fed-up to the eyeballs with dogs disrespecting the mother tongue,” said Donald Martel, the founder of the Coalition Avenir Québec. “Nothing frosts my ass more than an English Bull Dog not staying when I tell it to. Stupid English mutt; séjour. demour, hubaun, rester!”

The new law will come into force on June 1st, 2013, with final testing of all dogs commencing on July 2nd.

Any dog unable to fetch, stay, come, roll-over and speak in response to both languages, will be expelled from the province and air-dropped into Newfoundland.

Newfoundland's premier was understandably upset with the possible canine population explosion, “That's all we need is an influx of bitches from Quebec,” said Kathy Dunderdale, “Most of the dogs here now don't even understand our English.”

The new law will not apply to the French Poodle and the French Terrier.

Photo by: Julian Burgess flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed.

RELATED STORY:  Montreal bylaw requires dogs understand commands in both official languages

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