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Monsanto controls US government through Genetics.

Previous administration genetically impenetrable.

(SNN) – In a report released exclusively to The Sage, it has been learned that Monsanto Company is manipulating the current US Administration through genetics. “Monsanto has isolated and successfully patented the Obama Gene,” said a protected SNN source. “With this control, Monsanto has levied exorbitant royalty fees on the President of the United states to live.”

It has been learned that in exchange for a lower living fee, Monsanto has deferred the monthly fee to President Obama in exchange for the Monsanto GMO Global Dominance Foreign Policy.

“This explains how Monsanto has made such advances into the GMO food industry since Obama took power in 2009.” said the SNN source.

The Sage has learned that Monsanto began to map the human genome long before Obama took power and they attempted to map the Bush Gene, but could not locate enough computer power to filter out all the junk DNA.

Officials from Monsanto were not available to The Sage for comment on this issue.  

Photo by: alextorrenegra flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed.

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
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