news director

Please Support our Sponsors

U.S. Senate Squashes Plan to Collect Fees at Canadian Border

'We Still Want to Stick it to Canadians, Just Not So Obviously'

(SNN) In a dramatic move, the U.S. Senate has voted down a proposal that would force Canadians to be charged admission for entering the country. Many representatives from the northern states at every level, lobbied hard to have the bill struck down.

“These Canadians are coming here to warm up, shop and spend lots of money on entertainment in our state,” said asserted New York Governor, Andrew Cuomo. “Whatever the feds extort from the fun-seeking visitors is less that they will leave behind in our jurisdictions. This was just a cheap ploy by the meddling federal government to horn in on our racket.”

The spokesman from the Department of Homeland Security, who would only identify himself as “Agent 86”, was visibly disappointed by the news the fee collection study had been cut from their budget. In responding to the Senate’s move, the agent was blunt.

“We’re going to get our pound of flesh from those northerners,” vowed the agent. “Plans are already in the works for a tax on all luggage searches, vehicle searches and an extra surtax on strip and cavity searches, at all Canadian border crossings. After paying the $20.00 fee, the security screened Canadians will get their clothing back.”

Photo by: Raymond Hitchcock Flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed

DISCLAIMER: The above article is provided for entertainment purposes only and the article, image or photograph held out as news is a parody or satirical and therefore faux in nature and does not reflect the actions, statements or events of real persons. The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed by the authors of The Sage Satire and forum participants on this web site do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the The Sage News Network or the official policies of the The Sage News.
More from Chris McKerracher



Most Viewed

Promote Your Business

Social Activity

Top ^