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Vatican Announces Good Friday Name Change

Good Not Good Enough Anymore


Vatican City - Emissaries from the offices of Pope Francis, who insiders have dubbed 'The New Guy', have announced that it was the appropriate time to change the name of Good Friday to something that is more befitting the occasion. Cardinal Matthew Mark Lukenjohn revealed the surprising initiative at a press conference.

“Jesus, the one and only true Son of God, in order to atone for all the sins of mankind and allow our souls a chance at rebirth with a new covenant between humans and God, sacrificed his life on that Friday. The best we can do to describe it is “good”? Seriously? Groundhog Day is good. You know what I mean? Arbour Day is good. What about ‘Stupendous Friday’ or ‘Totally Awesome Friday’ or even ‘Great Friday’? Good? That’s a word you use when something is barely not bad.”

There have already been groups lobbying to have their suggestions considered, including the Gay/Lesbian/Transgenders for Jesus who believe ‘Fabulous Friday’ would be divine and the Muslim Brotherhood submitted ‘Just Another Friday’.

When asked his opinion on the matter, former pontiff, Pope Benedict, suggested the name “Wednesday” which elicited much rejoicing that he had stepped down from the papcy.

Photo by: Steve Evans flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor the article endorsed.

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