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Preacher Challenges New Public Farting Law in British Columbia.


(SNN) - With the passing of British Columbia Bill C-02 last year making farting unlawful in public places, a Vancouver preacher has challenged the new law. “One minute I was delivering a sermon and the next I was tackled by police, handcuffed and stuffed in the backseat of a police car.” said Pastor Hal E. Looya, a TV Evangelist for PBS. Pastor Looya was delivering a ripping message before a live television audience, when an errant microphone amplified the paster squeezing out a wet one. Unfortunately for Looya, the TV audience had five youths under the age of twelve in attendance.

"Section 5(1) of the Public Farting Act (PFA) prohibits farting in public where a child under the age of twelve is present,” said Vancouver Police spokesman Antonio Simeohni, “The act authorizes any police officer the powers of arrest when someone is found committing the offence.”

Since Bill C-02 became law enacting the PFA, it has come under considerable resistance. Last Christmas Eve, a fight broke out when a plain clothes police officer was seen tackling a Salvation Army Santa. The arrest came after the charitable Saint Nick tossed an air biscuit within 15 feet of a Walmart Store entrance. Shoppers, believing Santa was being mugged, kicked the crap out of the officer. When the air finally cleared, the officer was taken away in an ambulance and Santa was no where to be found. Sniffing dogs were brought in from the police canine unit but all the dogs could locate were a pair of stained red trousers.

Then two weeks later, a mother of three was yanked out of her car by an over zealous Vancouver Transit Authority officer. She had three children in her minivan driving in downtown Vancouver. Her offence was discovered when an elderly woman, waiting for a bus, saw the children pressed against the side windows like a stuffed Garfield toy. “It looked like the children were being kidnapped, and trying desperately to get out,” said Mabel Leadbottom, “If I had known that the mother had just shit herself, I would have never called the authorities. I don't think that law is going to stick.”

Since the PFA was introduced, it became illegal to fart in any public place, including public transportation, bingo halls, bars and lounges, within 15 feet of public entrances, public restrooms, restaurants, swimming pools or in the presence of children under the age of twelve.

“It's our God given right to pass gas, squeeze out a good one, toss an air biscuit or just plain fart,” hollered Pastor Looya from the steps of the courthouse, “I will fight this anti-farting bill to my last breath.” Hal E. Looya, was released under his own recognizance. The trial has been set over to August 15th, 2013, at the Provincial Court in Surrey, BC.  

Photo by: Richard Eriksson flickr photostream, Some Rights Reserved, The Sage nor this article endorsed. "Transit police at Vancouver City Centre station"


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